I am AQ

Loving God or Loving self

iamaq — Wed, 07 Sep 2011 09:13:04 +0000

Recently a sermon from Pastor Prince really got me thinking. What do we mean when we say we love God? I come to realise that our sense of loving God is because we want something good for ourselves. It’s like the bible saying “Seek first the kingdom of God and His Righteousness and all things shall be added unto you” Our motivation is not God, not His Righteousness but rather on the “All things” Thë “All Things” that will be added if i seek God and His Righteousness.

But then you come to realise that despite all this selfishness that stems from our heart, God never stopped loving us and granting us Favour. He will never say that our love for Him is too shallow and love us less and only love those who really love Him. King David was a fine example of a man who loved God above himself, despite all the grave sins and mistakes he had committed, God still love him and called him “A Man after my heart” He truly had the heart of love for God despite all his mistakes.

We pray for health, wealth, relationships, our careers, salvation of our unsaved family. Nothing wrong with all these prayers, but let us not forgot to love God first with our heart to ask him like we would ask our parents. Loving God is as good as loving Self. In fact better.

“With everything within me, i want to love you Lord, I want to love You with all that i am and bring joy to Your Heart.”

A season of reflection and restful increase

iamaq — Tue, 21 Jun 2011 02:20:40 +0000

Tis the season to be reflecting on my life and just rest in the goodness of my God. I am blessed with doing what I like at work. It is tiring but I haven’t love going to work since my stint in Sphm, but that was mostly due to the colleagues that make it a joy to go to work every morning. My work and interaction with the players at my table makes it a joy for me to go to work. Of course I have my fair share of bad mannered players but just one good player makes it worth it to work for the day. But life is more than work although work is a big part of life. I believe relationships in life is even more important. As I grow in wisdom(age), I begin to minimize the number of friends I keep in company, this are a few true friends other than my family that I hold dear. Thank you Lord for your favor and blessings in my life. Grant me success daily in my life as you have provided for the past years.

It’s that time of the year again

iamaq — Sun, 02 Jan 2011 04:57:17 +0000

That’s right, the time of the year that you make resolutions you were meant to keep but only to break your promise to yourself the very next day. Like that is going to keep me from making them anyway. According to Ruth, Pastor Prince has encouraged us to think of 3 things that we will want to accomplished by the end of the year 2011. So here are the 3 things i want to accomplished by the end year of 2011:

Top 3 things i want to achieve in 2011:

1. Put my financial house in order

I was not much of a saver since i started working 8 years back. That resulted in no savings and a mountain of debt till last year when i managed to scrap some money in the bank as a result of my frugal living, and believe me when i say i was not the kind of person u want to hang out with last year because i don’t want to spent money, period. So this year I will try to manage everything prudently, pay back what i owe give tithes to church every month faithfully and give my friends a treat when i know i can afford to. So if you happen to get a treat from me anytime in 2011, you know you are my friend Hopefully i can squeeze some money out for savings and also insurance protection too.

2. Get my spiritual house in order

I hope to get more involved in care group and be able to contribute in any little way i could. I wouldn’t be able to get involved with church ministries due to my shift work but i will still like to be able to serve in church. I want to really fall in love with Jesus all over again and to really love going to His house every week.

3. Get my social life back on track

I will love to be able to spend quality time with my close friends and be able to date once again. As much as i don’t like going on dates, but who knows i might like it if i tried. It has been more than 3 years since i did anyway. Kind of weird that i am actually blogging about it but well there is power in words, be it spoken or written, and it is going to happen in 2011. As much as my perception of marriage and relationships are warped and weird. I am praying that God will be able to put me back on the right track.

AMEN!!!!

Living each day happy

iamaq — Thu, 28 Oct 2010 03:00:55 +0000

There are too many things u can worry about everyday. From work to relationships w frens and families to even a little thing like a pimple on your forehead. If there is one thing that keeps me worry free is to take heart in every little thing. I use to like to surround myself with many friends and going out every single night after work. But now I appreciate the quiet nights at home in my room, watching a movie or just singing w my guitar in the quietness of my room. I take joy in being alone at peace w God and myself. I am not anti social, I am just enjoying quiet moments w myself and knowing myself. There might come a time I will have to share more of myself with someone but until then, this peacefulness is precious. The occasional get together w close friends then makes sense and the moments treasured.

We are shaped by the actions of our leaders

iamaq — Mon, 04 Oct 2010 04:50:26 +0000

Firstly, my condolences to the Lee families. MM Lee you have always been an inspiration to me, being an honest and no nonsense leader and founding father of modern Singapore. The responsibilities on your shoulder was huge when we began our independence in 1965, as the livelihood of many hang in the balance. Do take care of your own health. You and your family will always be in my prayers. God bless.

If you were to compare Singapore today and just 5 years ago, the difference is pretty huge. Not just how it looks, but the attitude and the mindset of the citizens have changed over the past few years. We are starting to forge a sense of pride and dignity in our identity as Singaporeans. So much so that MM has warned us not to take the prosperity of Singapore for granted.

Singapore is no longer mistaken to be a province in China but known as the Monte Carlo of Asia. This little red dot is now printed in a bolder red on many maps and globes around the world. I do think the idea of hosting F1 and the Inaugural Youth Olympics will help market Singapore Worldwide although it has proved to be a huge inconvenience to businesses in the Marina Bay area.

Many people think Singaporeans are getting too soft for their own good, this is only partly true, as many Singaporeans i know of have excellent work ethics, integrity and efficiency about them that may be lacking in the many foreign talents in Singapore.

The way we behave at work are largely shaped by what we see our leaders do. If we see our superiors who are lazy and always finding ways and means to cut corners and work less, we will imitate and behave in the same way. In the same light, when we see that our nation’s leaders as honest, hardworking and efficient in policy making, we will expect the same about our employers.

Growing up in Singapore, i am taught at a young age to work hard for what i want in life, to take initiative and always be prepared for any unforeseen circumstances. But with the popularization of books like Rich Dad poor Dad and many self help financial literature, many young Singaporeans start to believe that all we have to do is to let your money work hard for you. This concept like many other ideology are best implemented with sheer hard work and persistency which many of this books fail to mention. I for one was bought over by it for a period in my life.

Many have also commented that Singaporeans are a whiny bunch who complains about many things. This i am in full agreement, but it is only because we have seen and enjoy how things should be done and can be done efficiently in our own country to expect likewise in other countries and Multi national companies that we worked in.

That is the very reason why so many people are complaining about my employers with regards to payroll and leaves issue. To me the work load and schedule is not a problem as God has truly blessed me me a great schedule. But rather it is the hassle of the process for application of leave that gets on my nerves. I sincerely pray that the procedures will be fine tuned soon and my employers have many things that they can learn from our Singapore government.

My Mum

iamaq — Fri, 27 Aug 2010 00:23:03 +0000

My mum has been crying. She is as stubborn as I am. She usually just keeps everything bottled within herself. This morning she just cried because my half bros and sis were not going to share in the cost of the niche beside my dad at 光明山. For all of us it was just a case of credit/debit and balancing the left and right side of the books. My mum, so we 3 bros share the cost. But to my mum, this was her only time to be recognize as my father’s wife. She was never legally married to my dad. Now if the whole family including my half brothers and sisters shared the cost, to her this is her way of justifying her status and reason for her sacrifice all these years for serving and sticking with my dad.
I pray that she can be stronger and be happier soon. It is heart wrenching to see her suffer like that. On top of all these, she has to handle my aunt who keeps asking her for money as my my cousin is sick and my aunt has no money for her medication. My mum has advised her to seek government aid but she is unwilling. I have told her to stop helping my aunt as we are struggling on our own with Dad’s final expenses and our own daily expenses. If she needs help she will have to get it from her own children. Yes she has a son and daughter. My cousins are supposed to be the ones stressing over my aunt! Not my mother for sure!
If it was within our means to help we would but unfortunately this was not.
I have no doubt that my Jesus will guide me through this difficult time for my family. Meanwhile I just have to be spending my time at home and not spend unnecessarily.

My Dad

iamaq — Tue, 15 Jun 2010 01:53:24 +0000

On my way to work now, seated on the upper deck of the double decker bus crusing along bendemer road on a rainy Tuesday. It is Tuesday right? Now that I am working shift I lost a sense of which day is it?
We took away the car keys from dad yesterday and sternly reminded him not to drive my car anymore. It is way to dangerous now that he is getting weaker in his limbs and his sense of awareness and hearing are sometimes found wanting. He threw tantrum and wanted to take a bus instead to toa payoh for bak kut teh, his craving for the day. I told him that I would drive him there since I was not working yesterday.
Now he is taking longer to walk, to seat and to stand. I was talking to my half brother the other day and we both remembered how we were whip with his infamous belt when we were kids and now what we see is a frail figure of half the person he used to be.
I pray for my father’s health and my mum’s sanity. I wonder my father’s inability to love and understand others feeling has to do with his dad, because that is how I feel.

The simple life

iamaq — Tue, 01 Jun 2010 09:26:47 +0000

No, this post is not about Paris Hilton or her bffs. Just marvel at how I have changed over the years. When I was much younger and in my teens, my needs and wants were so much simpler. All I needed was a football or a nintendo to make my day. Relationships were alot simpler too, the puppy loves and friends forever stuff that went on. When I got older and started working, after the bad experiences with people and the influences of the media and american drama serials, I started to want things that I thought I wanted, and was more wary of people around me. After years of listening to others want in my life, I finally started listening to myself and only a select few to speak into my life. Things began to be simple again, I don’t struggle w chasing the next big commission, taking over key accounts from colleagues and many other office politics. Yes I am earning much less than I use to but I am also much happier. Truth be told there are also many politics in my work now but I don’t struggle w it anymore. I am just focused on making my company profitable and doing the best I can in my area of work. In the midst of it all I rest in the blessings of God in the state of restful increase. I have learned under pastor prince’s teaching to have “a good opinion” of who God is. This teaching alone has Rectified many wrong ideas I had about God. I admit to having intimacy problems with people around me. That missing jigsaw is right infront of me, intimacy with Abba.

Idol finale

iamaq — Thu, 27 May 2010 17:10:00 +0000

I haven’t been following idol on tv but the ocassional episodes on star world. Am catching the finale now and realize how raw the finalists are. When alanis morissette came out u can tell the difference between a star and the contestant. Christina made the same impression, her vocals are as usual , incredible! I know it’s not fair to compare. But I guess that’s why u pay to see and hear the real stars. I kind of wished Casey and lee made the final 2, But oh well crystal needs alot of polishing to be a gem imho.

Work required on weekends and public holidays

iamaq — Sat, 01 May 2010 00:32:56 +0000

As my job requires shift work I have to work on weekends and ph. I don’t mind working overtime and weekends and even public holidays. That is the point! I don’t mind?!? I question myself why? Is it becaus I have no social life to speak of or just so anti social that I don’t need company… I have come to a conclusion that its probably the fact that I am sort of a loner and I can live without company for an extended period of time. For a while yes but after that I will feel isolated. I am still very much a social creature, but I’ll cross my fingers and see how long will it take before I start to yearn for company. Maybe that’s why people start getting hitched w colleagues.